by Arc Patron of the Finer Arts, Seamus Neustead
Apparently the AFL’s newest addition to its growing hoard of illegitimate children - known by shadowy magazine AdNews as “Karmichael Hunt’s AFL team” - is on the verge of appointing its first creative agency to market its freaking brand. That’s right the Gold Coast Football “Club”(GCF “C”) has recently invited several agencies to pitch some ideas and the successful agency will be responsible for the “brand positioning” of the new “franchise”. This further evidences our claims about the illegitimacy of this so-called club. The only position that matters to a real football club is where it sits on the ladder and there is no room for odious expressions like “building the business” and “transitioning a new identity to the club”. We only hope that the GCF “C” transitions into oblivion.
Friday, September 18, 2009
Monday, September 14, 2009
Truth and Light
By Arc Culture Warrior - Connie St Croix
The shadowy figures at Death Star Command (AFL) have failed in their bid to see an illegitimate bastard-child into the preliminaries.
This is a devastating loss for Herr Demetriou and his bot munching propagandist Adrian Anderson whose blood stained hands could be seen pulling strings all through the week.
Such is the love these two have for the soulless laissez-faire corporation from Adelaide that they were more than willing to reschedule the preliminary final in order that the Crowbots (should they beat Geelong) would have the maximum amount of recovery time for the Grand Final.
Tough balls says the Arc, who had booked a massive venue for a series of piping hot lectures and game analysis for the properly scheduled 7.30 pm.
It was a difficult position the Arc was placed in, forced to support a traditional, yet loathed team in Collingwood. But it was a position the Arc was more than happy to embrace in order that the devious plans of the AFL were fouled. Let us hope that Geelong take care of the Woodsmen next week however.
Finally, goodbye Crowbots, you illegitimate bastard filth.
Truth and Light shall always reign supreme.
Friday, September 11, 2009
Nothing but Contempt!
By Arc Chieftain for Utter Rage and Uncontrollable Violence - Vinnie the Sausage Banger
For too long channel 7 and the AFL have treated footy fans with nothing but utter contempt. It is long past time that these shadowy figures of evil need to be brought to heel lest nothing changes.
Oh and Spud Frawley sounds like Marty Funkhauser tonight on Before The Game.
Oh and fuck you AFL and Channel 7. We absolutely spit on you, you fucking turd munchers.
The Arcs water tight Finals Analysis
By Arc Progenitor of Finals Prediction - Penthar von Never-Wrong
WESTERN BULLDOGS vs BRISBANE
(Winner to play St Kilda in next weeks Preliminary Final)
The fleet footed Western Bulldogs [or Footscray as the Arc recognises them] have widely been regarded as the 3rd best team of the year but need to win this week to avoid an embarrassing straight sets exit. First year coach, the illiterate Michael Voss, has done a better than expected job getting the barely tolerable contaminated club (subjected to the AFL's odious Structural Merger programme (SMP)) into the second round of the finals. The Arc has entered all the relevant data into their mind computers and concluded with the home ground advantage and a point to prove the Bulldogs should easily account for the Lions who have performed above expectations this year.
The Arc says: Footscray by 51
ADELAIDE V COLLINGWOOD
(Winner to play Geelong in next weeks Preliminary Final)
The Arc of Infinity is all about tradition and heritage and thus has very little time for the Adelaide "Global Holdings" Crows. They are an artificially created abomination with no history and even less honour. They are referred to as a "franchise" in modern AFL-Speak which is appropriate given they share the significance gravitas of a McDonalds restraunt. The Crows, with an assortment of Van Berlo-like trappings, go into this week's match as lukewarm favourites despite leaving out the original Van Berlo Mach I from the side. The fact that they play the loathed Collingwood Magpies this week leaves the Arc with a painful "Sophies Choice" scenario but we must tip the Pies given the fact they are a legitimate traditional club - albeit one we don't like.
The Arc says: Pies by 5
In summary - The Arc is hopeful of a win by 2 traditional football clubs and a blow to the AFL's near complete Death Star of mindless expansionism
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Sour Grapes Leaves Taste of Balls in Head Journos Mouth.
By Arc Vice Pro-Consul for attacking pole riding journos - Brigadier Jonathon Spittoon-Fullbrook
Chief football writer for the Herald Sun Mike Sheahan makes a few valid points in this blog.
Probably the most telling for me was his assertion about 'sour grapes' and I most definitely agree that it was sour grapes.
He seems to premise his relationship with those in the football world as being equal; like so many employers arguing that workers conditions should be agreed to under the common law contract. But the crucial difference is that the worker or in this case the 'subject matter' on the end of the story is nowhere near on an equal footing with the power that he has at his disposal.
He also argues in his 'closing statement to the jury' that his “fundamental task /role is to chase/break/report/analyse news." I say he’s being disingenuous here. The fundamental role is to make profits for shareholders through selling copy.
The fact that someone may or may have not beaten them to a story burns journalists to the core and often leads to the 'subject matter' being pilloried in further editions of the high quality journals we have in this country.
The rubbish that spews from the ‘brain’s of football writers is a blight on good taste and standards. The Arc hates your fucking rubbish.
You’re right Mike, most of us won’t side with you on this one, perhaps it’s because we know what journos are about and how they go about it. But that’s not your fault Mike; you’re a product of a corrupt, greedy and grubby system/institution.
Eat Dick.
Probably the most telling for me was his assertion about 'sour grapes' and I most definitely agree that it was sour grapes.
He seems to premise his relationship with those in the football world as being equal; like so many employers arguing that workers conditions should be agreed to under the common law contract. But the crucial difference is that the worker or in this case the 'subject matter' on the end of the story is nowhere near on an equal footing with the power that he has at his disposal.
He also argues in his 'closing statement to the jury' that his “fundamental task /role is to chase/break/report/analyse news." I say he’s being disingenuous here. The fundamental role is to make profits for shareholders through selling copy.
The fact that someone may or may have not beaten them to a story burns journalists to the core and often leads to the 'subject matter' being pilloried in further editions of the high quality journals we have in this country.
The rubbish that spews from the ‘brain’s of football writers is a blight on good taste and standards. The Arc hates your fucking rubbish.
You’re right Mike, most of us won’t side with you on this one, perhaps it’s because we know what journos are about and how they go about it. But that’s not your fault Mike; you’re a product of a corrupt, greedy and grubby system/institution.
Eat Dick.
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Sophocles' lesson an example how to flōreō
By Arc Convenor of Mythology and Ancient Wisdom, Seamus Neustead
The Richmond Football Club’s fortunes over the past quarter of a century are not without precedent. History provides a litany of examples of periods of enduring success for individuals, groups or institutions followed by periods of abject failure. In many cases there is a full recovery and in some there isn’t.
When it comes to Richmond it is not entirely inappropriate to apply the word crisis to its current situation. The meaning of the word “crisis” comes from medicine and refers to the point in the course of disease when the patient either descends to death or returns to health. The Richmond Football Club has seemingly reached this point and what it does in the coming months will determine whether it descends to virtual death, destined to linger on the bottom of the ladder, occasionally getting within a whisker of the final eight; or whether it returns to health to become a strong and vital player in the Australian Game.
What better opportunity, however, to reflect on history, and on the amazing examples of success and its transience. Perhaps there is no better example than that of Sophocles. Indeed Sophocles is remembered as the most awarded playwright in the dramatic competitions of Athens during the festivals of Lenaea and the Dionysia. Sophocles shot to fame when he took first prize in the Dionysia theatre competition over the reigning master of Athenian tragedy, Aeschylus.
It is well known that Sophocles was a great tragedian whose success endured for a long period of time. Sure you might say Sophocles was a dirty old erastês, or in today’s parlance, a pederast, but he was one of the greatest playwrights of the Ancient world. Aristotle counted Sophocles’ Oedipus the King as the highest achievement in tragedy.
What is not well know about the famous tragedian is that for a time he was considered a bit of a joke among his fellow Athenians, particularly when he turned his hand to another genre, comedy, experimented with dithyramb, and began focusing on the comic, but often banal daily lives of fellow citizens. Given such an extraordinary display of hubris, it is not surprising that commentators at the time, Aristophanes being among the most vocal, began to question Sophocles’ sanity. “Sophocles has clearly lost his marbles!” Aristophanes exclaimed when Sophocles turned up to the Tuesday evening “Marble Madness” round robin competition empty-handed.
How did Sophocles turn it around? He had already introduced the third actor! What other innovations could the master muster? He went back to the drawing board. He introduced skenographia to liven up the set. Further innovations in dramatic structure and character development soon followed. More phallic props were incorporated into the play than ever before.
It was not long before Sophocles was back on top, with foreign rulers inviting him to attend their courts (although he was too proud to accept such extravagances).
It is difficult to imagine a world without Sophocles. No one person has had more influence on the course of history with such profundity and such acuity than that of Sophocles.
No doubt the Richmond Football Club will have Sophocles in mind when it appoints a new coach and sets out its new strategic direction in the coming months.
The Richmond Football Club’s fortunes over the past quarter of a century are not without precedent. History provides a litany of examples of periods of enduring success for individuals, groups or institutions followed by periods of abject failure. In many cases there is a full recovery and in some there isn’t.
When it comes to Richmond it is not entirely inappropriate to apply the word crisis to its current situation. The meaning of the word “crisis” comes from medicine and refers to the point in the course of disease when the patient either descends to death or returns to health. The Richmond Football Club has seemingly reached this point and what it does in the coming months will determine whether it descends to virtual death, destined to linger on the bottom of the ladder, occasionally getting within a whisker of the final eight; or whether it returns to health to become a strong and vital player in the Australian Game.
What better opportunity, however, to reflect on history, and on the amazing examples of success and its transience. Perhaps there is no better example than that of Sophocles. Indeed Sophocles is remembered as the most awarded playwright in the dramatic competitions of Athens during the festivals of Lenaea and the Dionysia. Sophocles shot to fame when he took first prize in the Dionysia theatre competition over the reigning master of Athenian tragedy, Aeschylus.
It is well known that Sophocles was a great tragedian whose success endured for a long period of time. Sure you might say Sophocles was a dirty old erastês, or in today’s parlance, a pederast, but he was one of the greatest playwrights of the Ancient world. Aristotle counted Sophocles’ Oedipus the King as the highest achievement in tragedy.
What is not well know about the famous tragedian is that for a time he was considered a bit of a joke among his fellow Athenians, particularly when he turned his hand to another genre, comedy, experimented with dithyramb, and began focusing on the comic, but often banal daily lives of fellow citizens. Given such an extraordinary display of hubris, it is not surprising that commentators at the time, Aristophanes being among the most vocal, began to question Sophocles’ sanity. “Sophocles has clearly lost his marbles!” Aristophanes exclaimed when Sophocles turned up to the Tuesday evening “Marble Madness” round robin competition empty-handed.
How did Sophocles turn it around? He had already introduced the third actor! What other innovations could the master muster? He went back to the drawing board. He introduced skenographia to liven up the set. Further innovations in dramatic structure and character development soon followed. More phallic props were incorporated into the play than ever before.
It was not long before Sophocles was back on top, with foreign rulers inviting him to attend their courts (although he was too proud to accept such extravagances).
It is difficult to imagine a world without Sophocles. No one person has had more influence on the course of history with such profundity and such acuity than that of Sophocles.
No doubt the Richmond Football Club will have Sophocles in mind when it appoints a new coach and sets out its new strategic direction in the coming months.
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